Nonviolent Communication (NVC)
· 2 min read
Why Practice Nonviolent Communication?
Improve communication quality by ==valuing everyone's needs==. ==Doubt and violence are manifestations of unmet needs==.
What NVC Is Not
- It is not about appearing friendly.
- It is not about getting others to do what we want; it concerns mutual understanding between people.
Ways to Strengthen Connections and Understanding Between People
- Express our feelings and needs vulnerably
- Recognize ongoing feelings and needs
- Expose the vulnerability of feelings and needs
- Actively listen to the feelings and needs of others
- The core of empathetic listening: presence, focus, space, and care, ==along with verbal expression of feelings and needs==
- Do not give advice, make judgments, comfort, tell stories, sympathize, analyze, or explain, ...
- Regardless of what is said, the key is to listen to the other person's feelings, needs, opinions, and requests
For example: ==Because you need... so you feel...?==
Engaging in These Behaviors Can Lead to Distance Between Us
- Evaluating others, making judgments, labeling, analyzing, criticizing, comparing, etc.
- Worth considering (i.e., certain behaviors deserve punishment or reward)
- Demands (not accepting others' choices; wanting to punish those who do not act according to one's own ideas)
- Refusing to choose or take responsibility (keywords: have to, should have, guess they will, they made me do it, etc.)