The AI Feature Metric Trap: Why DAU and Retention Lie About Stochastic Surfaces
A PM walks into the AI feature review with a slide that reads "+12% engagement, +8% session length, retention up 3 points." The room nods. Two desks over, the support lead is staring at a different chart: tickets touching the AI surface are up 22%, and the most common resolution code is "user gave up, agent helped manually." Both numbers are real. Both come from the same product. The PM's dashboard is built on the assumption that the AI feature emits the same shape of event as the button it replaced. It doesn't. And the gap between what the dashboard counts and what the user experienced is where AI features quietly fail in plain sight.
The deterministic-feature playbook treats interaction as a click stream: user fires an event, the system reacts, the user moves on. AI features have a different event shape — a task arc with phases, retries, side trips to a human, and an offline judgment the telemetry never sees. Importing the deterministic dashboard onto that arc is the analytics equivalent of running 2018's interview loop against 2026's job. The numbers go up. The thing the numbers were supposed to predict goes down.
